It has occurred to me that America is now a society of people looking for an edge to catch on. It started with feminism, I am pretty sure, when women started complaining if a man held a door for
DISCLAIMER: I do not find you attractive in any way, in fact I find you rather repulsive and wouldn't want to have sex with you if you were the last person on earth. Therefore, any complements I might pay you when in a forgetful state should not be interpreted as an advance of any kind, but rather a momentary lapse in which I inadvertently behaved with kindness.
My plan would then be to distribute there cards to everyone in every room I enter. Sadly, such a strategy wouldn't work, because someone's edge would be that I didn't want to have sex with them and the drama that ensued wouldn't be worth the safety offered by my disclaimer. If you have ever encountered someone with a Borderline Personality Disorder, you will know what I mean right away.
Further evidence of the prevalence of seeking that edge to catch on is the prevalence of litigation in
The solution? To be honest, I don't have a fail proof solution. It does occur to me that we can spend our whole life trying to avoid providing the much sought after edge for others and as a result never actually live our own lives, and that doesn't seem a fair trade. I do feel that we can identify those people in our lives who are regularly looking for an edge, and seek either to avoid them or, if that's not possible, be very careful when interacting with them. On a more proactive note, we can work to surround ourselves with healthy people and, as we get to know one another better, trust that our motivations will be clear to them. Finally, and perhaps most importantly, when someone does find their much sought after edge, we can choose to walk away and not get caught up in the drama. Misery loves company, but the company seldom loves the misery!